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My sister and I were really bored, so we headed to the Deck at
Trump Marina, because we heard Vanilla Ice was giving a free
show there. The price was about right and beers there were
only $2. We spent the entire time goofing on him. We were
about 5 feet from the stage, and for some reason he kept
throwing water on us.
The show was supposed to begin with fireworks, but they
weren't going off so Vanilla just started shooting a shower of
sparks into the audience and into the straw roof over the
stage. I had visions of the Great White concert going through
my mind. I needed another beer at this point.
He started off singing some crappy songs, so I told my sister to
yell out, “Shut the f*@% up and sing Ice, Ice Baby!” You can
see her response below. We heard classics such as Ice, Ice
Baby and the theme from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2, Go
Ninja Go. Ahh, I thought the hits would never end. At one
point he just started yelling different catch phrases like, “Go
white boy, go white boy, go!”, “Ice, Ice Baby” and “Show Me the
Money!” Yes, that’s right, he was yelling catch phrases from
like 10 years ago, some of which weren’t even his.
His dj guy was named "Dirty Sanchez", which shows that
Vanilla Ice hasn't really matured very much since the 8th
grade. His drummer was "Clint Eastwood". Just in case you
were wondering, no, its the same Clint Eastwood that played
Dirty Harry. Just thought I would clear that up.
What amazed me the most about everything were the people
there. There was not one, but two fights that broke out. One
of them was right in front of me and I was almost forced to start
cracking some heads myself if they touched me. He had one
crappy song many years ago, yet still; hot women were
crowding the stage and grinding with him. He could have
gotten laid easily. One woman left the stage and she was
almost in tears, “I touched him! Oh my god!” I’m not sure who
was sadder, Vanilla or his fans. In the end however, it was a
highly amusing evening. We had a lot of fun at Vanilla’s
expense and we drank a bunch of cheap beers.
After the Vanilla Ice concert, I was drinking beers and screwing around on my computer
until about 3:30 in the morning. This in turn caused me to oversleep and I didn’t leave for
Philadelphia until 9 A.M. My friend Jack was there since like 6:45 A.M. and Jon and Jen
were there at some crazy early hour as well.
We got off the High Speed line at 16 and Locust and walked the ten blocks or so up to the
Museum area. The crowd was starting to get thick so Tami and I pushed our way forward
as far as possible. Almost everyone had some political agenda. There were hippies
everywhere.
We made it to about 1,000 ft from the stage on the Parkway. It was crowded, but we could
still move slightly. There was a large area of flowers in the middle of the Parkway that was
surrounded by a giant fence. One by one, people started jumping the fence until
eventually, the entire fence was pulled down by the angry mob. A mad rush of people
stomped all of the flowers and they really screwed up our view. So people started throwing
rocks and water bottles at them. It looked like a riot was going to start at the Live 8
concert. Only in Philadelphia. Tami and I decided to change locations before the riot
broke out. This proved to be more difficult than we thought.
degrees out and we had to piss. There was no way in hell I was going to stay here for the next 6 hours. It took us a good 45
minutes to get our way out of that mess and into a park on Pennsylvania Ave.
I think there were about 8 porta-potties for the entire crowd of about 1 million. I am sure that many, many people ended up
pissing themselves or urinating in the street. I was one of the lucky ones that made it to a bathroom. While the guy in front of
me on line was pissing, a stupid woman decided to launch her kids onto the roof of the porta-pottie. The kids were a little
scared, but she kept pushing them up. By about the third kid, the roof of the porta-pottie started to collapse, much to the
dismay of the guy inside. The entire roof was caved in, but she kept pushing more kids up. Everyone was screaming at her
and calling her nasty things, including myself. If she destroyed the bathroom before I got to pee, then there was a good
chance I would have killed her. Luckily, the anger of the crowd made her come to her senses.
We snuck through a baseball field to Spring Garden St and it was here that we met the J-folk. I yelled, “Look! Crazy people!”,
and started taking their pictures. They didn’t seem amused. I don’t know where these crazy people come from, but they
always show up at large gatherings to tell me how I am going to Hell. They are an almost endless source of amusement.
Somehow, I’m not really sure how, we made it to a park along side Pennsylvania Ave., but this time much farther up. We made
it to within about 500 ft of the stage. We could actually see the performers now! There weren’t too many people around us
and there were a ton of food and drink stands. We actually put out a blanket and got comfortable.
At about the fourth hour, it did start to get a little crowded where we were, but it wasn’t too bad. We just sat there and watched
the craziness around us. People climbed on top of all of the trucks around us. A couple of guys had a large sign that read,
“Show us your tits”. (I was actually a little pissed I didn’t think of that.) A guy climbed a traffic light and sat on the top. Soon his
friends tried climbing pole to up there and the whole thing started to bend over from the weight.
One scary looking guy grabbed a half empty Gator-aid bottle out of the trash and started drinking it. I thought I was going to
be ill. Then he climbed a tree above the Trojan tent and started singing and dancing like a monkey to Def Leopard. Speaking
of the Trojan tent, they were giving out condoms to the crowd. I got about 30 of them. I guess they took one look at me and
knew that I must have lots of sex. I mean, how can any sane girl resist me?
After the concert, we walked to a bar called Tir Na Nog and had a beer and then over to an Irish place called Moriarty’s. We
had a few beers and some dinner and then we went over to Dead Fred’s again, where we met Jon, Jen and their friends. We
pretty much stayed here until about midnight before catching the train back to Jersey. You can tell by the last picture that Tami
really wanted to go home. It was a long exhausting day, but we had a great time and drank a lot of beers.
PJ managed to get a room at Resorts Casino, so we headed
into Atlantic City. We started off with a few beers in the hotel
room and a 2-liter bottle of rum and Coke that I concocted. I’m
pretty sure there was more rum than Coke.
We were all a little poor, so we settled for the Irish Pub yet
again. I think they are starting to know my name in there. We
sat outside again, but the crowd wasn’t quite as rowdy as last
time. We stayed there until 2 A.M. or so when they decided to
close the outdoor area. On our way back in we met a drunken
Leprechaun who was trying to pick up women. Here’s a picture
of him with Tami and PJ below. Below right is a picture of Jon
and PJ.
