Bay Fest was kind of a bust because it was raining and crappy out. To make up for it, I went
to Philadelphia to celebrate Howie's birthday. We took the train in from Lindenwold and went
to Dead Freds on 3rd and Market. The place was crazy. Instead of normal bar stools, there
were swings hanging from the ceiling. Drunk people on swings seemed kind of dangerous to
me, but what the hell. There was also no cover charge and $1 beers. Of course those beers
were things like Pabst and Beast, but $1 is $1. We also saw hot lesbians making out and doing
lots of sexual type things. I think one of them was checking me out. Anyway, even though
the bar isn't in Jersey, I'm going to do a review of it because it is close.
April 23, 2005
I was feeling like crap most of the day, but PJ called me and wanted me to go with her to Club
1133, which is the high rollers club, at Resorts. So, I put on my classy "Lucky Cock Beer"
t-shirt and headed out. The club is located on the 13th floor of Resorts and you have to drop
thousands of dollars to be invited in. Once inside, there is an open bar and a buffet. After
eating and having a few martini's at a table, we sat over at the bar to talk to the very drunk
guys sitting there. I'm amazed that some of these guys were still alive they were so drunk.
We talked about gambling and we made fun of the long haired guy from California who was
sitting there. Well, I wasn't making fun of him, but the guy sitting next to PJ kept leaning
over, loudly singing, "Dude Looks Like a Lady" to her.
At about 1 A.M., we left Resorts and went over the bridge to Brigantine to St George's Pub
and drank until God only knows what hour.
Here is a pic of me trying to be classy in the high rollers club.
We got a room at Trump Plaza tonight. We didn't really go out too far. We went over to
Planet Hollywood in Caesars and drank Terminators. These consist of vodka, rum, gin, Gran
Marnier, Kahlua, cranberry and beer. Yes, there is beer in the drink. Afterwards, we went to
the Boardwalker Bar in Trump Plaza and drank martini's. It was pretty uneventful until three
hookers showed up and started feeling up the groins of the guys at the next table. After a few
minutes, management threw them out. They started yelling "Suck my dick!" amongst other
things, which really didn't make too much sense. Then of course, some other guy yelled
something about sucking him and things starting going downhill from there. In the end, a few
guys left with the hookers, so everyone was happy.
April 16, 2005
Once again I was in Mercer County at an event at the College of New Jersey. After the event
at about 5, I started to drink brandy with a friend of mine while we talked about philosophy. I
discovered that the more brandy you drink, the crazier and more interesting your philosophy
becomes. After we finished the bottle, we went out grabbed a few beers and dinner so we
could sober up a bit. It seemed to make sense at the time. A little after 9 I hit the road back to
Mays Landing. I started speeding down 206 after I got off of Rt 195. As I was passing a car
that was going far too slow (the speed limit), I looked over and of course it was a cop. They
were none too happy with this. They yelled at me and berated me for a little while and then
told me that they smelled alcohol coming from the car. I actually looked at them straight faced
and told them that I didn't drink at all. I believe that when you are going to lie, you are better
off going balls to the wall and lying big. By saying a half assed lie like, "I had one or two
drinks.", you give yourself away because it is obvious. The officers yelled at me for having a
radar detector and let me go free. I was home by 11 and just passed out.
April 13, 2005
I went up to Mercer County to get my car fixed. I decided not to drink with the Japanese
folks today. I sat in the Quaker Bridge Mall all day reading and drinking coffee and stuff. At
about 5, I got my car and I headed over to Wildflowers again with one of my old professors
and drank a few beers and had some dinner.
Before I knew it, it was getting late, so I headed down to a bar called Firkin (formerly Marley's
Ale House) in Ewing. Just a quick side bar, in college, we found Jon passed out drunk in his
room one evening, so we decided to bring him to Marley's. We dragged him to my car and
strapped him into the front seat. Once we arrived at Marley's, we had to figure out how we
were going to get Jon inside the bar. He was passed out cold. We were thinking of doing
something a la "Weekend at Bernie's", but the bouncer would never go for it. We did actually
try it in the parking lot however. At one point Jon fell down in the parking lot and started
puking, only to receive applause from other people in the lot. Eventually, we realized that
getting him into the bar with us was pointless, so we had to take him back home.
On the way home I stopped at Rumer's in the Ramada, in Bordentown. I t was a crappy little
hotel bar, but I was amazed to see the vast diversity of people. I quickly made friends with
everyone and soon enough, they didn't wouldn't me to leave. Eventually it became too late for
me to even visit another bar, so I just headed back home.
April 10-11, 2005
I spent most of the day outside with Tamatha drinking beer on lounge chairs, enjoying the
sunny day. My friend Evan was home from FL for the weekend, so I headed up to Rockaway
for a BBQ at his parents place. By this time it was about 8. We drank some beers and hung
out until midnight. At 4 A.M., we woke up and I drove him to Newark airport and then drove
back to Atlantic County, just in time to get dressed and go to work. It is 9:45 on Monday night
and I think I am going to die.
April 9, 2005
We just stayed local tonight. We headed to Testa's Goodguys Pub and played pool and drank a
whole bunch of beers. Then we headed back and started drinking rum. This is where it went
downhill I think. At one point I was arguing with Tamatha and I decided that I had enough
crap; I was going home. I started getting ready to leave and then realized that we were at my
apartment. Yes, you heard that correctly, I forgot where I lived for a moment.
April 5, 2005
I went to Mercer County to get work done on my car. I dropped it off at about 8:30 and I just
decided to walk around town until I got the call it was done. At about 11:30, my legs started to
hurt from all the walking and it was getting hot out, so I checked into the nearest bar. It turns
out it was a sushi bar, so I got some lunch and some drinks. 1:00 Rolled around and I still had
no word from the mechanic, so I kept drinking. I started fraternizing with all of the Chinese
men that worked there. We watched car chases on Fox News Channel and they all cheered
when there were close calls.
At about 1:30, I was still drinking, and a middle aged Chinese woman came out of the back and
started talking to me. She was laughing and telling me stories about how she got in trouble for
beating her kids or something. Like the rest of them, she didn't really grasp the English
language very well, so I didn't understand most of what she was telling me. I think she might
have been trying to pick me up, but I have no idea.
At about 2:00, I had been drinking for 2.5 hours and I was getting fairly intoxicated. There
was still no call from the damn mechanic. The Chinese guys started taking bets on how much
I could drink. This is never a good thing, so I decided at this point it would be best to finish
my drinks and leave, so that's what I did at about 2:30. I wandered about a mile back to the
shop and sure enough the car was ready. It was actually ready at 11 friggin' 30, but he forgot
to call me. So basically, I got drunk in a sushi bar for no good reason. It was interesting
though, so I can't complain too much.
I headed over to the College of New Jersey to see some of my old professors. After talking
for a bit, we decided to go out for some drinks at Wildflowers on Rt 31. (I know some of you
are thinking it, so no, it is not a gay bar. It is just a poorly named Italian restaurant.) We
parted ways at about 9.
On the way back through Trenton, I drove around and looked at the flooded areas. I could see
the damage to one of my favorite clubs, Kat Man Du. I couldn't believe how hight the water
line was. Before getting on Rt 206, I stopped in West Trenton at Al's Airport Inn for a beer,
but it was pretty uneventful.